Well, the trip has flown by, and I thought I should at LEAST let you guys all know that, even though according to my blog, we are still in Istanbul (funny, I wish....), we really are, in fact, home. Or at least, my cousin's house. But yes, we are home, meaning America... we leave from Atlanta, Georgia to drive back to NC in approximately 12-14 hours. The culture shock of coming back has been indescribable... I catch myself saying excuse me in Turkish to the people I bump into on the street, and am taken off-guard by the fact that they actually say it back to me in English. I find myself humming all the Turkish pop songs that got stuck in my head in the 6 weeks we were over there. I miss the minarets and the prayer calls, and the public transport, and the incessant walking, and the cobbled streets full of so much history. I miss the beach and the food and my Turkish friends and my new-found Turkish family (who, by the way, are wonderful and amazing people who enfolded me with so much love, it made me cry more than once). But, I will admit, it IS nice to have a Wendy's frosty again, and NOT to have to worry about the weight limit for suitcases! Whenever I wrote my mother, I made a habit of telling her that I missed home, but not enough to come back, just enough to bring all of my people over. I still feel that way. I love Turkiye so much. One of the deepest wishes of my heart is that you all could experience it and love it. I wish you could see and love the people and the culture and the history and the food and the music. I wish you could sit in the covered bazaar and have Turkish chai and cake and close your eyes and listen to the sounds of the people - the clink of the glass tea cups, the footsteps echoing up to the painted roof, the voices of the shop sellers and the all the centuries-old dreams that whisper from the corners of the ancient walls. I wish you could walk and walk and walk around Istanbul until 2 in the morning carrying shopping bags and eating street mediye dolma and knowing that you are perfectly and completely safe. I wish you could go to a shop and see the people's faces light up as you speak a few halting Turkish words (pronouncing the vowels incorrectly, of course) and see the kindness in the seller's eyes as he pins an evil eye to your shirt (a wish for your protection from evil) and drops three liras from the price of whatever you were going to buy. I wish you could hear a drum-beat coming from a corner of the city and follow it and find a young boy sitting there making a little money from his immense talent and practice. I wish that you could see Turkiye, see the WORLD, the way I see it now: eternally different to your eyes. But, seeing as you can't... I will do my absolute best over the last couple of weeks before school starts back to help you feel a fraction of the wonder and wideness and joy and loss that I feel right about now. I will do my best to give you a taste of the sights and sounds and stories, of the people and the food and the smells, of everything that could bring each of you a fraction closer to EXISTING with Turkiye the way I did. But if you ever have a chance... please, GO! I want you all to see that country, MY other country, in the truest way you can. I love you all, and I have missed you very much...
~Bekah
2 comments:
tears are rolling down my cheeks as I write this... hun, You described the way it is, though really, there are no words for such a place. I'm right there with you. I understand those feelings. I actually started crying at band camp - we were doing warm-ups, and the music reminded me of the traditional Turkish music, and I just couldn't contain it, I sobbed. But when I told a friend, she rolled her eyes. how wonderful to feel so alone, right? ..to know such a beautiful place, and not be able to share that. Not be able to show them WHY it means SO much..
.. I love you, and had such an amazing time. I learned so much, and will never forget this past summer. EVER! I have the same ideas - MUSt MUST MUST catch up on my blog!!!.. or i guess start it!? :P But priorities, now that band camp is over, and I have time= finishing all the sumer hw.. School starts back the 9th. hahahh ohhh welll wish mee luckk! :D
Hope things are going well, and that you have an awesome time at camp! good luck on your blog, and your school work. definitely keep in touch??... kiss cheek, other cheek, and.. kiss forehead (im being nice, and plus other people can read this!!! :D haha!.. I LOVE YOU!!!
My dear niece,
What a touching entry this is... It must have touched my soul so deeply that by the time I was finished reading, I had tears rolling down my cheeks... and, since I consider myself a pretty hardened person by life, that says a lot. I didn't realize how much you loved my native country while we were there. I got the sense that you were enjoying things, but I didn't imagine the extent of it.
Know that your second country and Turkish family will be there to welcome and embrace you again next time. You will always have "Rebekah's rooftop perch" at my Kusadasi home to enjoy. Now, I cannot end without giving credit to your open-mindedness, loving and accepting attitude. Some people visit foreign countries with set perceptions in mind and may not be willing to open themselves up to experience life from a different perspective. You were... So give yourself some credit for that. I also want you to know that many people there were touched by your sweet presence and gentle soul. That was your gift to them. Personally, I thoroughly enjoyed watching your delight in Turkish food,sights,its people, and seeing my native country through your eyes. Thank you for that personal gift. In addition, thank you for tolerating my "Mediterranean woman" ramblings!
Although, sometimes during our travels, I worried (of course - I am a Mom after all! :-))and felt the heavy responsibility of being the only adult in charge of you girls, I thoroughly enjoyed this trip. As a matter of fact, when I was attending the AIDS Conference in Vienna the following week, I felt strange not having you girls w/me!So who knows, perhaps we might do a repeat performance... Life is full of possibilities... As for now, concentrate on your studies and take the necessary steps in the path of becoming a strong woman. Remember all of our discussions and contact your Turkish Teyze whenever and for whatever...
Take good care.
With love and hugs,
Sureyya Teyze
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